Paris Portingale

Talks with God, Part Five

Paris Portingale chats with God again. Paris wants to know if comedians go to heaven. And then he asks about crocodiles again.   God had come down and we were talking about heaven. I asked, “Are the great comedians in heaven? Abbott and Costello, Burns and Allen, the Marx Brothers, Jerry Lewis?” “Yes, most of them are up there.” “Lenny ... Read the full article
Paris Portingale

Paris Portingale is a writer and dog owner. While having a somewhat indifferent attitude towards abstemious self-restraint, he does follow the safe guidelines of four standard drinks a day, although his standards are a great deal higher than most, certainly the medical profession’s. Paris is visited often in the night by God, and the meetings are anything but pleasant.

Sour Americano: Watching Your Beloved Sports Team Lose from a Starbucks in South Korea

Ben Werner shares what it feels like to watch your favorite sports team lose while sitting at a Starbucks drinking an Americano in South Korea, 13 time zones away.

A Speech from the Regent of Doom

Mike Magnuson attended the University of Wisconsin’s recent commencement ceremony and reflects with mixed feelings on the general state of higher education in Wisconsin.