Emerging from the innards of the beast named Reddit, Kate Turner brings you back the best of Face Swap and the worst of viral trash. Damn, Daniel.
Trolling a Troll
Internet trolls. The indefatigable beast of many faces. Can you defeat a troll with normal weapons (re: abuse)? Well, no, but there’s a better way. Kill them with kindness. Try this. Next time you come under attack from a troll, agree with everything they say and be sure to add many lols to the offending comments. This leaves them thinking that their negativity had no effect you, so just go zen. Be the insult, but not of the insult. Breathe in, Breathe out.
Failing that, you could opt for a more forward approach:
Have you heard someone utter “Damn, Daniel!” in the past week or two and wondered what the hell it was in reference to? Well, we’re sorry. Here’s why:
Okay, so, my opinion? Personally, I want to clock the guy saying damn, Daniel. More than that, now I want to punch the masses who are quoting damn Daniel! So just stop it!
You see it’s all due to the kid’s voice. You know how some people just have a face you want to punch; well that same notion goes for me with certain people’s vocal chords. I understand my weirdness here, but the above is what turns God-fearing Reddit browsers into violent maniacs. [Damn, Daniel – Ed.]
The Best of Face Swap (thus far)
Thanks to apps like Snapchat and Face Juggler, any idiot can forgo life’s tasks in favor of taking randomly awesome pictures. This really is the ish. A new bar has been set. Whether its been set high or low, no man can say.
Having said that, these face swaps are absolute gold, or some sort of precious metal.
Talking about wasting useful time, procrastination is my middle name. Well, I’m so horribly inflicted, it’s not my middle name, it’s my first name, with the font set in towering bold. I honestly don’t know how I get anything done, but that’s what the last minute is for. It’s like that for a lot of people, isn’t it? You go to bed at night with the thought that you’ll get up early the next morning, start the day with a healthy smoothie, make use of the sunshine, and go for a run. Why not do some charity work and put a smile on a person’s face, or finish that project you were working on that one time? But no, in the end you miss the alarm, wake up at midday, drink a liter of Diet Coke for brunch, stay in your pajamas all day long, pick the zits on your face, pull on a paper bag to cover your shame, grab a jar of peanut butter and a large spoon, and go binge watch Arrested Development on Netflix from the comfort of your bed till midnight. Tomorrow you’re going to get up early, start the day with a healthy smoothie, make use of …
Lastly, I have no idea who this woman is, but I love her. She’s looked as if she’s resolutely decided on not being amused at an amusement park. Fair play. Her awesome scowl made me want to hug her droopy face.
Take that, Splash Mountain!
A Blurst from the Purst
For reaching the end of this week’s Blurst, your prize is a gift-wrapped Reddit classic. Word of warning, though, prepare yourself for the tidal wave of feels!
See you next week, my twisted peeps.