Kate Turner

The Blurst of Reddit: Vindictive Grans, Abject Rejection, and #SteveBuscemiForMaryPoppins

Reddit is much like a food court with everything closed, save for that Kebab joint, but it’s 9:00 a.m. And that’s far too early for a kebab.


What Sex Sounds Like (Spoiler Alert: You)

Sex tourism. Pleh. Actually, this would work on me. Who doesn’t want to go somewhere where the sound of their voice sends people into a gushquake. Just by the by, I always wonder what our accents sound like to foreigners. Ever do that thing where you try and just listen to tones and sounds and cut out the words?

Well, we do it here in Australia and we sound ridiculous. And that’s why I love us.

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Thanks, Grandma

If you’ve watched The Visitor (or any film with some mentally deranged elderly person), you’ll identify there is something peculiar about this particular gran. I don’t buy her, “Oh, whoops, that shouldn’t have happened,” hand gesture at the end.

I bet she’s been planning this all year.

The time came to make the cake and the glee on her face had this kid a tad nervous. Just see his nervous laugh after the incident, he knows what’s up.



This Katie Doesn’t Mess About. I Like Her Already.

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Let’s Try to Caption This Owl GIF

My attempt: “After agreeing to accompany the children home, Theodore the owl soon realized that in fact he joined a cult. #shit!”

[Ed. – “Fifteen seconds into the last train home, and he gives you that look.”]

Yes, you can say I drink coffee


Toilet Paper, a Serious Issue? Or People with Too Much Time to Think about Shit?

I gotta say, one thing I hate more in life is toilet paper talk. “Katie, do you fold, roll, or scrunch?” My response is, “Do you really want to know how I go to the toilet? What the fuck is wrong with you?”

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We Need to Start a Petition for This. I Would Die Happy. #SteveBuscemiForMaryPoppins

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Finally, the Truth Is Revealed

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