Now that Donald Trump has been uninvited from another funeral, I think it’s time we pay him his due. He’s just doing what we wish we could all do—stay at home.
Pop quiz, hotshot. Which of the following events would you rather attend?
- A funeral for an older coworker who actively disliked you.
- A funeral for an older coworker’s mum who actively disliked you.
- A needlessly excessive wedding held by some rich pompous types who’d absolutely use the opportunity to rub their wealth in your face.
The correct answer, of course, is none.
One of John McCain’s final wishes was that Donald Trump not attend his funeral. The man who will be remembered in the history books as a great American hero didn’t want a man who will be remembered as a traitor to our country to disgrace his funeral.
— Ryan Knight 🇺🇸 (@ProudResister) August 26, 2018
In the age of clickbait, I think it’s far too easy to pile onto Donald Trump. He’s an easy target for our criticism and criticizing him feels like the right thing to do as it’s an easy route to progress-town. But, I think it’s because we don’t understand him and, on some level, we want to be him.
Hear me out.
As we grow into our adult selves, the number of Facebook pals we have dwindles with the desire to attend whatever they’re putting on. But, often, because of the feelings of residual guilt and/or social obligation of going to their event because they went to ours, we rock up to wherever and spend the time looking at our watch or dream of that weekend on the couch where we can do nothing.
We don’t want to be there, these people don’t want us there, but they won’t not invite us, and we won’t not attend. Everyone is trying to avoid the social tag of being “that person.”
Donald is living his best life, outside the constraints of needless social obligation. He’s daytime drinking on the couch while we’re trying to squeeze into the suits and dresses that no longer cooperate. Yes, Donald has taken his social expulsion to the extreme, pouring gasoline on his head and lighting a match, but it takes extreme action to break free of assumed social responsibility.
He’s articulated this crusade against the self, all to ensure that everyone hates him, all to ensure that his fridge remains free of dates to be saved, acceptances to be returned, and threats of future weekends ruined. How sweet that would be, a dance card forever clear.
Now, we might castigate what he does on these “golf” weekends, but the fact that he has the luxury to attend as many as he pleases is the point. He has the opportunity and he’s burned every bridge to ensure he plays alone on his social island. He’s bringing back leisure time from foreign backyards and back into his own. Genius.
So, next time you get an invitation you’re not keen on, be like Donald. In lieu of attending, just type up a capitalized message thin on grammatical accuracy but thick on harsh nonsense and send it back. Bang. Done.